TV or not TV
In baseball, you get sent down to the minors. In showbiz, you get conned into a TV show. Often, a network is so overjoyed to grab such a talent that they forget to write a decent script and think the name will instantly boost ratings.Movie stars on TV are perverse. We’re trained to think that it’s a one-way track. Once you’ve left, you’ve graduated. You’re not supposed to crawl back into the womb. And if you leave and never make it out in the big, wide world of the silver screen – returning means admitting you’re a total failure.
With that in mind, we fail to recognize that some TV stars can make a boatload of cash without stepping one foot in movies. Sometimes it's better if they don't try at all. And one thing large-livin' celebs never fail to take notice of is where the money is. The result is a lot of strange concoctions lately, and at least one serious empire.
Here is a list of movie stars who have gone small, for better or worse.
(Note: I am leaving out perennial straddlers like Brian Dennehy and Sally Field.)
Star: Jeff Goldblum
Show: Raines
Result: Won't live until fall.
Star: James Woods
Show: Shark.
Result: Fish out of water.
Star: Geena Davis
Show: Commander In Chief
Result: A TV show provides a better schedule for the new mother. Comes out looking like Lincoln next to "The Geena Davis Show." Not to mention Cutthroat Island.
Star: Patricia Arquette
Show: Medium
Result: Demonstrates definite clairvoyance.
Star: Jennifer Love Hewitt
Show: Ghost Whisperer
Result: It wasn't necessarily her skills that got her leading status. And what I think got here there obviously haven't disappeared, so I really don't understand this.
Star: Charlie Sheen
Show: Two and a Half Men
Result: TV success puts good "Spin" on messy breakup.
Star: James Spader
Show: Boston Legal
Result: Had to go through Stargate to find Captain Kirk.
Star: Glenn Close
Show: The Shield
Result: One season on the sidelines, then right back into...(?)
Star: Kiefer Sutherland
Show: 24
Result: Like a truck full of fertilizer! What a move.
Who did I forget?
posted by Stand-up Chris @ 11:03 AM
1 Comments:
I would ad Danny DeVito to this list for "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia." Haven't seen it, but Danny's limoncello-fueled performance on the View seems indicative of something. Here's hoping the little big man hops back on the big screen soon.
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